The Medium
by Lovely Lady Lunatic
Summary: If a freaky, faceless dude calling himself the Truth promised you everything you ever wanted with the only condition that you had to save the world, wouldn't you accept?
1. Truth and the end of the world

This idea TOTALLY just came to me!!! Eeeek, I'm so excited!! Please, please tell me what you think, I've never written a serious story before, just funny shorts. This is based on manga FMA, because there are just way too many anime ones, and I don't want to be cliché.

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I own nothing!! Pweez don't sue me, I'm just having fun!!

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_The sky darkened with a solar eclipse. Dogs were barking franticly, straining at their leashes. A terrible, insane laughter echoed through the city, possibly coming from underground somewhere. Buildings began collapsing as the ground trembled. Screams rang out as mothers tried to pull their loved ones away from the wreckage. Then, abruptly, the screaming stopped as a surge of energy passed through the city and every living thing collapsed, dead. All was silent except for the ongoing maniacal laughter. After a while, a black shadow crept out of the depths and devoured everything._

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I woke up suddenly, tasting bile in my mouth. It was the same damn dream that I'd had for a whole month now. I didn't know how many more apocalypse dreams I could take before I just gave up sleep completely. You'd think it would've gotten easier to handle, but nooo.

_"The truth is never easy."_

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, fighting off a scream of irritation. Then I opened them slowly.

Yup, it was him.

The Truth stared at me with his freaky faceless face. I scowled.

"Go back to Hell, Mr. Riddle Dude. I am so sick of dealing with you and your stupid fortune cookie speak EVERY SINGLE MORNING."

He grinned with his freakish, overlarge smile. _"I only send people to Hell, my beautiful Sasha. I don't live there."_

"Where do you live then?" I asked curiously.

_"Within you, and within all of my children!"_ He sang.

I threw my shoe at him. "NO RIDDLE SPEAK."

_"It wasn't a riddle!"_

"Bullshit. Now go away."

_"Sasha Arnette. A whole month and you still aren't even remotely curious as to what I want of you?"_

"Nope."

_"But- But why??"_

"I don't like mind games. And you are all about them. Therefore, I don't like you. GO AWAY."

_"What if I told you that the dreams would stop if you did as I asked?"_

"…Damn."

_"Will you listen to my request, then?"_

Uggh. I did NOT want to make the freak happy, but the dreams were so awful…

"Fine. Speak." I snarled.

He beamed, then floated over to my bed and sat down next to me. His insubstantial body didn't even make the mattress creak.

_"To put a very, very long story short, this world faces disaster. A very ancient, powerful being seeks to absorb everything to make himself stronger. Including…" _He paused dramatically. "_Me."_

I snorted. "Um, aren't you, like, God? Shouldn't you be, y'know, invincible?"

He frowned. _"Are you mocking me?"_

I rolled my eyes. "Not at all, dude. I mean, why would I mock an immortal entity who has to ask a crazy, psychic, vision plagued, redheaded STRANGER for help?"

_"You aren't a stranger to me, Sasha dear."_

"Yeah, yeah, you knew me before I existed, blah blah blah-"

_"You misunderstand me. We have met before. At the Gate."_

"At the whuh?" I stared. Then I froze. "Hold up. Do you know what happened to me?? Why I am like I am??"

_"Yes."_

I waited. Then I realized what he was doing and glowered.

"…You aren't gonna tell me unless I go save the world, are you?"

_"That's right! Equivalent exchange, dear! You do what I tell you, and I'll tell you everything you want to know about your past. But be forewarned- It isn't pretty."_

I nodded. "I figured. But I have to know. I can't just walk around with the first 10 years of my life missing, never knowing who my parents were, and why I have these…gifts."

The Truth looked proud. _"Good girl. Now, you have a day to prepare. Tomorrow at sunrise I will send you a guide. Do everything they say and I will grant your wish."_

"Any suggested supplies?"

_"Just pack as though you were going camping. My guide will provide anything else you need."_

"Kay. I need to get dressed. LEAVE." I attempted to shove him off the bed. He floated out of my reach, giggling merrily.

_"See ya!" _He chirped before disappearing with a pop. Probably went back home… within me. Gaaah, creepy thought.

I sighed, rolling out of bed. I had a lot of packing to do.

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Well?? Well?? It's short, but I'm working on it. Please review!


	2. Truth's guide vs my boat

I'm baaack!! Yays!! Review review review!!!

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Lovely Lady Lunatic: …Do I have to do a disclaimer every chapter? Didn't I already say I don't own anything? Except for you, that is.

Sasha: I think you should do it again, just to be safe.

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Meh. You do it.

Sasha: Why me??

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Do it or I'll make you be Yoki's girlfriend.

Sasha: AGGH!! SHE OWNS NOTHING!!

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Shaloma Island is a beautiful speck of land, so tiny and rural that it isn't on any map. The inhabitants mostly consist of elderly folk and happy couples. It's fortunate for me that it's so peaceful here, because otherwise, I'd never be accepted. Why?

For starters, my appearance. My hair is bright red, not like that carroty orange color, but blood red. And my eyes are purple. PURPLE!!!! What the heck?? Maybe my dad was a marten, haha…

Next, attitude. I LOATHE being constrained in any way. Half the time when someone tells me not to do something, I'll do it JUST TO PISS THEM OFF. Very immature, I know. So it's pretty safe to say that all government hates me.

And finally… I'm a psychic. And the fact that I can't remember the first 10 years of my life (during which my parents either died or abandoned me) has me suspicious that the two things are connected.

Yeah. Flipping sweet, I know. Not.

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I sat on my front steps with my shoulder bag thrown unceremoniously at my feet. I was feeling unusually twitchy, trying to imagine what this mysterious guide would look like.

_It's probably a really tall guy, _I thought, _with ridiculously long black hair in a black cloak thing. Gawd, that'll be SO embarrassing, walking around with what looks like a wanna-be vampire…_

My musings were interrupted by a soft mewing. I looked down and was startled to see a sweet little black kitten staring up at me with… red eyes. Huh. Whatever, it was still a cutie.

"Hi there, little fella! Who might you be?" I cooed, crouching next to it.

"_My name is Chander."_

I blinked and stared. The kitten squirmed under my gaze.

"_What?"_

"…Ha. Ha ha hahaa!!!!!!!" I giggled. "Wow, YOU'RE my guide? I guess Truth isn't very serious about saving the world after all!!"

Chander hissed. _"How dare you!? I am one of the highest ranking demons in hell!!"_

"So, what, is Hell a petting zoo?"

"_HOW DARE YOU MOCK ME!?!"_

I rolled my eyes. "Sheesh, chillax fluffy. You can't really blame me for being surprised."

"_Hmph. I seriously doubt that such a dumb girl will save the Master." _He grumbled.

I snorted. "I ain't doing this for your master, fluffy, trust me."

"_The name is Chander!!"_

"Whatever. Where are we off to, _Chander_?"

"_Amestris. Have you heard of it?"_

"Nope!" I chirped. "But you have, and you are my guide! So, guide me!"

"…_I better get a pay raise for this."_ Chander groaned. _"Do you have a boat?"_

"I sure do!" I proudly pointed to my little fishing boat, which was tied to a palm tree on the white sandy shoreline.

Chander gave me The Look. _"Do you really think that hunk of wood will bear us through the sea to Ameistris?!"_

I was offended. "Hey!! It's an awesome boat, don't you diss it!!"

He rolled his eyes. What an odd sight, a kitten rolling his eyes. _"You are hopeless." _He set his tiny paws firmly on the ground, and with a flash of red light, the palm tree was gone, and my boat looked…

"That is the most depressing boat I have ever seen." I stared at the transmuted boat in front of me. "What is that supposed to be, a ghost ship?!"

He sniffed. _"It's awesome. Be silent, you know nothing of style, Madame Tomato."_

"T-TOMATO?!?!" I shrieked, my face heating up.

"_Shut up and follow me." _He leapt lightly aboard. I scowled and complied.

_I think I would've preferred the wanna-be vampire. _I thought to myself, wondering if I had made a mistake.

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Reviews make me happy and keep me motivated!! Tell me whatcha think!


	3. My epic mission

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Wahoo!!! Another chappy!! I'm so proud of myself!!

Chander: _ You're rather full of yourself, aren't you?_

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Shaddup, Fluffy.

Chander: _HISS!!!!_

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Oh, by the way, all my characters' names mean something.

Chander: _Truly? What does my name mean?_

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Evil Fluffy Puff of Death.

Chander: _**WHAT**__?!? I SHALL SEND YOU TO THE DEPTHS OF HELL!!!!!!_

Sasha: Lovely Lady Lunatic doesn't own anything except for Evil Fluffy Puff of Death and me.

Chander: _Review while I kill them._

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I had never left the Island before, so as we slowly lost sight of my homeland among the waves, I began to feel incredibly nervous.

"How do you know where you're going??" I asked Chander, panicking. "You don't even have a map!!"

"_Demons always know where they're going. Be silent, you're distracting."_

I growled at this, but fell silent.

… For a few seconds, that is.

"So, what's this mission that Truth guy has for me, anyways?"

"_To save the world."_

I rolled my eyes. "I know that!! But can't you be a little more specific??"

Chander sighed and turned to look at me with his large red eyes. _"It's a bit of a lengthy explanation."_

I waited.

He sighed again. _"The being who seeks to destroy my master is a man without sin."_

My eyes popped. "What?! You mean he purged himself of sin?? HOW??"

"_He separated himself from his sins using alchemy."_

"Well, that's interesting and all, but I can't see how it's relevant..."

Chander's eyes narrowed in frustration. _"Recall the law of alchemy, girl!"_

"I don't use alchemy. I use psychokinesis. Brain power. It's a completely different thing. So why don't you tell me about this law?"

"_It's not just the law of alchemy. It's the law of the whole universe. 'Whenever something is gained, something of equal value must be lost.' That's the law of Equivalent Exchange. In this man's case, it was the reverse. Something was lost, and therefore must be gained. He found seven worthy vessels, each talented in their own way, and infected them with his sins."_

I was horrified. "What happened to them?" I whispered.

He bowed his little head sadly. _"They were taken over. They became immortal monsters, fueled off of human lives. I seriously doubt they recall who they once were. They are called homunculi. They are also known as the Seven Deadly Sins- Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Envy, Wrath, Sloth, and Pride. "_

I gulped. "Right. And what do they have to do with me?"

"_You must force them to repent. Only then might the poor souls be saved." _Chander said gravely. _"Without his immortal minions, our foe will be considerably weakened. Only then will we be able to defeat him."_

I was incredulous. "I gotta make them what?! Repent??_ HOW?!_"

Chander shrugged, his silky black fur gleaming in the bright sun. _"No idea. But once you exorcise the sin within them, I will send it to Hell where it belongs. That is why I am here."_

I groaned. "Why didn't you get a priest or something to do your dirty work??"

"_I don't know. I asked Master the same thing. But he seems to trust you, said he knows you very well, and that he thought you perfectly suited for the job."_

"Hmph. How can he say he knows me when I don't know him?" I pouted. "I bet that freak has something to do with my 10 years worth of memory loss."

"_YOU DARE TO CALL THE KING OF HEAVEN, HELL, AND EARTH A __**FREAK**__?!? __**IMPUDENT TOMATO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!**__" _Chander screeched.Focusing my energy, I used my psychokinesis to dump sea water on him. Ignoring his sputtering, I thought about the Sins. I felt so bad for them. I really hoped that I wouldn't have to fight them or something, because I doubted I could go all out, knowing that there was an innocent person trapped within them….

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Lovely Lady Lunatic: This is fun!!

Sasha: Why are there SEVEN flipping deadly sins??? Why can't there be, like, TWO?!?

Chander: _Lazy mortal._

Sasha: Useless fluff ball!!

Lovely Lady Lunatic: REVIEW!!!


	4. Train rides are fun

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Sasha and Chander finally get to meet Ed and Al in this chapter!! Yay!!!

Chander: _Pah. What's so great about that little midget anyways?_

Ed: **WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE COULD BE A NEWBORN****?!?!?!**

Sasha: Daaammn, this boy has lungs!!!

Al: Sigh. Brother, you're so embarrassing… Miss Lunatic owns nothing except for Sasha and Fluffy- I mean, Chander…

Chander: _What was that?!_

Sasha: Haha, I like this kid!!

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Review!!!

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_Why must Central be so damn far away?? This is SO BORING. I HATE train rides. _I thought sulkily. I sat on the train by myself, trying to ignore the frequent stares I received from the other passengers. Chander had ditched me and ran off somewhere. Stupid fluff-ball. Now I didn't have anything to do. I sighed, staring out the window.

I nearly jumped out of my skin when three guys with guns burst into the compartment.

"EVERYONE, HANDS UP!!!" They pointed their guns at us. Everyone who was smart immediately complied.

Guess who DIDN'T put their hands up. Haha…

"Hey. HEY!!" The biggest of the lot shouted at me. "You DEAF, girl?!?"  
"Nah, I just don't understand ASSHOLE-SPEAK very well. Care to repeat yourself?" I snarled.

The guy's face turned a funny shade of purple as he sputtered incoherently. One of his buddies stepped forward.

"Put your hands up or I'll shoot you." He said, pointing his gun at me.

"Don't EVER tell me what to do." I growled.

"Very well." He pulled the trigger.

I didn't even try to dodge the bullet. Instead, I focused my energy on the small projectile, stopping it in midair. Then, I flung it into the guy's leg.

"AAAAAAGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!" He screamed, toppling over.

The big guy paled. "She- she's an alchemist!!!"

"I'm a psychic, actually." I smiled. "So, who's next?"

They wordlessly dropped their guns. I concentrated, and their own belts flew off and bound their hands together. My fellow passengers cheered. I smirked, proud of myself, but jerked in surprise when I heard the door behind me slide open. I whipped around, ready to fight off another goon and stopped short.

It was a giant. A giant in… armor?

"Wow! Who took out all these guards?" I blinked. His voice sounded so young and… cute. With his terrifying appearance, it seemed oddly contradicting.

"That'd be moi." I pointed to myself. He seemed to be in awe.

"Wow! By yourself? You must be really strong!" The passengers nodded vigorously.

"She sure is!"

"If weren't for her-"

"We all-"

"She's a psychic!!"

"A psychic?!" Armor guy was shocked. "I didn't think there was such thing…"

I laughed. "Well, now you know. Wanna tell me what's happening, Mr…?"

"Alphonse Elric." He held out his huge hand.

I shook it. "Sasha Arnette."

"Well Sasha, the train has been hijacked by a group of extremists. My older brother Edward is a State Alchemist, so it's his responsibility to help take back the train…" His voice trailed off, and he looked down at his feet, seemingly embarrassed. "I hate to ask this from a girl, but… would you mind helping us? Brother is so reckless… I don't know if we'll be able to do this by ourselves…"

I beamed. Giant or no, this kid was so sweet that I couldn't turn him down. "Of course I'll help you! What's the plan?"

"Brother is on top of the train, making a beeline for the engine room. We need to secure the train from below." Al said, relieved.

"Alrighty!! Let's do this!!" I pumped my fist in the air, hyped with all the action. Al giggled and led the way. After that, it was about a half hours worth of stopping projectiles in midair and laughing as countless bullets ricoched off of Al's armor. Finally, one of the guys we were terrorizing managed to snatch the phone.

"HELP!! A GIANT SUIT OF ARMOR AND A CRAZY REDHEAD- **AAHHH!!!!**" I kicked him in the face. Then Al stepped forward. "**GIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!**" The guy screamed as Al lifted him by the front of his shirt and hurled his against a wall. "I'm dy….ing…" He groaned. Gawd, what a drama queen. I realized he hadn't hung up the phone. Sniggering, I put it back in place.

"C'mon! We have to help Brother!" Al yelled, already heading for the door. I nodded and followed after binding Drama Queen's hands. We paused in front of the door when we heard a strange _nyu _noise.

"Attention all criminals." Huh? I looked up. Where was that voice coming from?

"That's Brother!" Al whispered happily.

"We have recaptured the engine room and the rear cars. All that is left is this car. Please release the hostages and surrender yourselves. Failure to do so, and we will have to remove you by force."

"Dammmn." I whistled softly. "Your bro is good at this kind of thing."

"He has to be. It's his job."

While we had been talking, a coarse voice had been shouting at Edward defiantly. Apparently Ed didn't take well to being talked back to, because there was a loud booming noise.

_"Passengers, you would do well as to shelter yourselves. I'm afraid we are going to have to use violence to remove these imbeciles." _Wait. That voice…

"C-Chander?!" I squeaked. What was that stupid fur ball doing??

"Who was that?" Al looked puzzled. "Do you know-"

He was cut off by the sound of screaming and roaring water. Al and I exchanged a look. Al opened the door and we stepped aside as a wave of water splashed through, carrying several men in it.

"**Welcome**." We chorused, staring down wickedly at the thugs.

"A- a huge suit of armor and a crazy redhead…" one croaked, white as a sheet.

"That's us!" I chirped, making the guy's shoe fly off and hit him in the face. We quickly knocked them out and sprinted into through the door. I saw a tall, pirate-looking guy with an automail arm charging a diminutive blonde boy, also with an automail arm, who I assumed was Edward. Ed easily blocked Pirate's blow.

"You're using some cheap goods" Ed chuckled. I seized the opportunity and kicked the guy in the back just as Al punched him in the head. Ed hacked off Pirate's automail. Pirate dropped to the floor, unconscious.

_"Well, well. I see you can defend yourself. Excellent." _I looked up to see Chander drop through the hole in the roof and land lightly on his feet.

"D-Did that cat just talk?!" Al squeaked.

"That's not all he can do." I grumbled.

"Are you Sasha?" Ed asked me. I nodded. "Chander told me about you. It was really kind of you to take him in after he was turned into a chimera."

"Um, ya, of course!" I laughed, casting a skeptical sideways glance at Chander. Chander gave me a glare that clearly said _GO WITH IT. _Whatever. I smiled happily.

_ I like train rides._

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Sasha: He was on the roof with Ed the whole time?!?

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Yup!! Nice twist, right?

Ed: Review please!


	5. Meet Roy Mustang

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Wahoo! I'm on a roll!!

Sasha: Jesus Christ, woman!! It's 1:30 in the morning!!!

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I don't care.

Al: Don't push yourself so hard, Miss Lunatic!!

Chander: _Yes, take it easy. If you die, __**I**__ die._

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I'M FINE!!!

Ed: Sigh. The Lunatic owns nothing, please review, blah blah blah…

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"Hi, Fullmetal." A deep voice called out. I turned to see a handsome man with dark hair striding importantly across the train station to us. Ed looked severely disgusted.

"Oh, it's the colonel. Hello." Al said sweetly, shifting Chander in his arms so he could wave.

"Why does that face look so unhappy?" the colonel asked Ed slyly. I assumed 'Fullmetal' must be Ed's state title.

Ed groaned. "Arrgghh, I should've stayed out of the colonel's jurisdiction!!"

The colonel sighed. "So cold, as usual. Hm?" He caught sight of me. "Oh! Who might you be?"

Ed answered before I could open my mouth. "Her name is Sasha Arnette. She helped us a lot during the whole hijacking episode. She's **16**." I didn't understand why he stressed my age until I saw the colonel's face fall.

"What a shame… She's such a beauty…" He murmured, disappointed. Ohh. A womanizer. I threw a grateful glance at Ed, who grinned.

The colonel coughed. "Anyways… I see you two haven't restored yourselves to your bodies yet."

I was confused. It must've shown because Al quickly explained, "Brother lost his arm and leg and I lost my body in an accident a long time ago. We are looking for something called the Philosophers Stone, which is an alchemic amplifying device. Hopefully it'll be enough to restore our bodies."

_"I see. Sasha and I can relate." _The colonel jumped and stared at Chander in shock. _"I was turned into a chimera, and Sasha lost memory of the first 10 years of her life. We too seek this stone. Perhaps it can undo the damage done to us."_

I rolled my eyes at this ridiculous lie, but went along with it. As a demon, he probably knew what he was doing.

Recovering faster than I expected, the colonel smiled charmingly at me. "Well then, perhaps you should accompany Ed on his missions. You will probably find what you're looking for much faster in the company of a state alchemist."

"You guys wouldn't mind?" I asked anxiously, turning to the brothers.

Al beamed (if armor can beam). "Of course we don't mind!"

Ed nodded. "You guys are really strong, so I doubt you'll get in our way."

_"Excellent." _Chander said smugly. _"So, how exactly-"_

"UWAH!! YOU… SON OF A.." We looked up. Pirate had somehow escaped from the soldiers. He was staring at us, looking rather insane. He was wielding a bloody knife from his broken automail arm. An official looking woman with sharp eyes stepped forward, pistol ready.

"Colonel. Please stand back-"The colonel shook her off.

"This should be fine." He raised his hand. I only just realized that his glove had a transmutation circle on it.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!" Pirate lunged at the colonel. The colonel snapped, and a giant burst of flame consumed his attacker.

"Ew." I wrinkled my nose at the smell of charred flesh and hair. The colonel winked at me. "Sorry, dear." He turned back to pirate. "I went easy on you. Resist any more and I'll turn you into cinders, got it?"

"Fucker! Who the hell are you??"

"Colonel Roy Mustang, the Flame alchemist. Take care to remember that." Roy turned and strode away.

"Dammnn!!! That was cool!!" I squealed, trailing after him. He smirked, and I had to remind myself that this type of guy did NOT need any ego stroking.

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"You owe us, colonel." Ed grinned evilly.

"There is something disturbing about being in your debt…" Roy smiled, looking pained. "What do you want?"

_"Information on the stone, obviously." _Chander mewed. _"Surely one as high ranking as yourself knows something of it."_

"Why must you leave immediately? Wouldn't you like to stay and have a cup of tea?" Roy was looking at me when he said this, but Ed was the one who answered.

"Why in the world would you want to have tea with a bunch of **kids** like us?" Roy frowned at the reminder of my youth. He stood and began browsing his shelves.

"Well, I don't have any recent information on the stone, but I do have something you may find interesting, especially you, Chander." Chander cocked his head to the side.

_"How so?" _He asked, curiously.

"You aren't the only talking chimera, you know. Shou Tucker, the sewing life alchemist, created one. Perhaps you will all find out more if you paid him a visit."

"Sweet!" I sang, excited to be able to do something, but puzzled as to how this would help Chander and me find and exorcise the Seven Deadly Sins. Oh well. They could wait.

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_"I don't understand how this Tucker managed to create another being like myself." _Chander grumbled from his perch on my shoulder. We were all in a car, on our way to the Tucker household. _"My creation was an accident, during which my creator and all of his assistants were killed. How did this man manage it and yet live?"_

"Nobody knows." Roy shrugged. "But his chimera wasn't nearly as successful as you. It only spoke once."

"What did it say?" Ed asked eagerly.

"It said, 'I want to die.' After that, it wouldn't eat and eventually died." We all were horror stuck.

"…Well, I suppose we'll see what sort of person he is." Ed said grimly as the car pulled up in front of a… HUGE freaking house…

We got out and approached it. I thought I heard something charging us and turned to see Ed get flattened by a giant, dopey looking dog. Chander's fur bristled as he hissed at the massive thing. The dog wagged its tail at him.

"Hey, Alexander! Stop that!" A tired looking man was standing in the doorway with an adorable little girl next to him.

"You're really pretty!!" She squealed when she saw me. Awwww!!! I beamed at her. This was going to be a nice trip.

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Lovely Lady Lunatic: Nina… Sniff…

Sasha: Don't get all teary on us, Lunatic-

Lovely Lady Lunatic: WHO'S TEARY?!?!

Chander:_ Review…_


	6. Nina and the shopping spree

Sasha: Where's the Lunatic? Shouldn't she be here? It is HER story, after all…

Ed: I think she was kidnapped by Greed.

Al: What?! Why??

Ed: Greed wants a starring role in this story.

Chander: _Well that's a shame, because this fanfic has no need for another hero while it has me._

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Yo.

Sasha: Hey! How did you escape, Lunatic?

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I told Greed that I was Envy in disguise and that I was going to go tell Father on him if he didn't stop harassing me.

Ed: He actually fell for that?

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Apparently my smirk is very convincing.

Chander: _What a moron. It will be so easy to defeat him._

Al: Miss Lunatic owns nothing. Please-

Sasha: -Reeeview~!

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Mr. Tucker's house was the most beautiful house I'd ever seen. However, it was also the BIGGEST house I'd ever seen. Meaning I got lost constantly.

After 20 minutes of wandering the immense hallways, I finally found the HUGE library which Ed and Al had basically set up camp in.

Ed's eyes were glued to the book in his hands, seeming oblivious to the world. Al was also trying to read, but he was being distracted by Nina, who wanted to play. Chander was napping, perched on a windowsill far out of a curious Alexander's reach. I smiled at the cozy scene, but books- especially boring old alchemy books- weren't exactly my thing.

"Hey guys, I'm going shopping." I declared.

"What for?" Ed asked without tearing his eyes from his book.

"Clothes, obviously." I gestured at my white sundress and woven sandals. "These are all the rage back on Shaloma Island, but here it's completely out of style."

Nina squealed excitedly. "I used to go shopping with Mommy all the time! Can I come too? Pweaase??" I melted.

"Of course you can, sweetie! But we should ask your daddy, ok?"

"Ok!!" She grabbed my hand and together we raced through the halls to Mr. Tucker's study.

I peeped in. Mr. Tucker was crouched intently over a worn book. Sheesh, is that all alchemists ever do? "Mr. Tucker?"

He started, slamming his book shut as though it were something private. Huh. Whatever.

"Nina and I want to go shopping. Do you mind?"

He recovered quickly. "Not at all! It'll be good for Nina to have a girl's day out. Here-" He reached into a drawer and pulled out a wallet. Counting out a generous amount, he said, "This is for Nina's purchases and both of your lunches."

"Oh, you don't have to pay for my lunch. Roy gave me a lot of spending money-"I said quickly.

"Consider it my treat." He flashed a smile at me.

"Big sister, Can we go now?" Nina asked, tugging on my dress. Mr. Tucker handed me the money.

"Yes, you two can go. Be safe, alright Nina? Behave yourself for Sasha, now." Mr. Tucker patted Nina's head with an oddly pained expression on his face. I vaguely wondered what that was about, but I didn't ask. _None of my business. He's probably just upset that he never does anything with her._ Satisfied with that conclusion, I took Nina's hand and we left.

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Some people (like Ed) are terrible with little kids. I am not one of those people. I think it's because I'm rather childish myself, so I just click with them. But I have a good excuse for being so immature- I didn't really have a childhood, now did I?

We raced around Central, hyper as can be. We tried on pretty much everything we saw. Nina found some ADORIBLE dresses that made her look like a little princess, and I found a bunch of cute outfits as well, my favorite of which was a red tank top, black shorts, and black boots. After I bought them, I changed into them in a bathroom and took Nina out to buy icecream, which we ate on our way home.

"We're baaack!" I sang as we entered. I stopped when I saw an officer with a cigarette in his mouth.

"Hey there." He saluted. "I'm here to pick up you and the boss- huh?" he looked over my shoulder with an amused expression. "What are you doing, boss?"

Ed was lying face down with Alexander on his back. "I'm taking a study break." He said, his voice muffled by the carpet.

"Does that mean you found something useful?" Mr. Tucker asked. Ed looked sheepish. "It's alright, you can come back tomorrow."

"Big sister, big brothers, you're coming back to see me again?" Nina asked us.

"Of course! We'll play again tomorrow." Al waved goodbye to her.

Cigarette Man stopped in front of the door. "Oh yeah. Mr. Tucker, I have a message to you from the colonel. He said that evaluation day is coming up, don't forget."

Mr. Tucker was quiet for a second. "…I understand."

We left. "What's an evaluation?" I asked Cigarette Man. (I really needed to remember his real name…)

"Once a year, state alchemists have to submit the results of their research. If they don't do a good job, their licenses will be revoked."

"Huh." I murmured. Maybe that was why Tucker had seemed stressed…

.

.

"So your mom and dad split up, huh?" I asked Nina the next day. She nodded sadly.

"Yeah. Daddy said she went back to her family."

"You must get so lonely…" Al sounded upset.

"No, it's ok! Daddy is nice, and I have Alexander, too!" She sounded like she meant it. But then she paused. "But… It's been kinda lonely lately, 'cause Daddy spends all of his time in his lab."

We were all quiet. Then, with what must have been tremendous effort, Ed surfaced from his book. "Ok, I'm starting to feel stiff from all of this reading."

"Maybe you should exercise a bit, brother." Al suggested.

"Yeah. Hey! Mutt!" He snapped at Alexander, who sat up eagerly. "I need to exercise, so I'll play with you!"

"Come on, Nina!" Al called to her as we followed Ed and Alexander. She squealed happily and ran after us. The moment we got outside, Ed took off at a dead sprint, Alexander at his heels. Al laughed.

_"For one with such small legs, he runs surprisingly fast." _Chander commented from the tree that he had claimed as his own.

"**WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT- AGGGGH!!!!**" Ed was flattened once again by Alexander.

I suddenly had an idea. "Hey Nina, wanna see something cool?" Her eyes brightened and she nodded eagerly. I picked her up from around the waist and concentrated. Suddenly, we were flying through the air. She screeched in pure delight as Ed, Al, and Chander looked on in amazement.

_"You failed to mention that you could fly." _Chander said in a strangled voice. I snorted.

"I didn't know I could. But apparently I can."

"Big sister!!" Nina yelled. "Let's fly around my house!!"

"You got it, girl!" I swooped off, zooming over the roof. When I did, I caught a glimpse of Mr. Tucker through one of the windows. He was watching us with a frighteningly desperate look on his face. I flinched, wondering if I had just seen something private, and decided not to mention it to anyone.

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"Ugh, what nasty weather." I grumbled, staring at the sky. "It looks like we won't be playing with Nina outside today." Ed nodded.

"Yeah, it's defiantly going to rain."

_"Why has the beast dog not attacked you yet?" _Chander asked, puzzled. Ed and I exchanged a glance. That was kind of weird, seeing as he had tackled Ed in greeting every day so far.

Al was knocking on the door. "Mr. Tucker? …Huh?" He opened the door. "Weird. Nobody's here."

I walked in. "Yo! Tucker? Helllooo?...Hey wait. Isn't this trespassing?" The brothers ignored me, going deeper into the house. We stopped when we saw Mr. Tucker in an open doorway.

"Oh, hello there. Take a look at the finished product. This is a chimera that can learn language." He gestured towards a- WHAT THE HECK?! What the hell was it???

"Watch this." He turned to the chimera. "This person is Edward."

The chimera cocked its head. "Ed- ward?" Ed gaped in amazement.

"Good job!" Tucker patted its head. Ed crouched next to it, looking awed. I kept my distance. That thing was freaky.

"I sure saved my neck!" Tucker told me, smiling in relief. "I'll pass the evaluation for sure now!"

Meanwhile, the chimera thing had been croaking out Ed's name. Then it looked at me.

"Big… Sister?" It asked.

I felt my blood freeze. Ed looked as though he had just swallowed poison.

"Mr. Tucker, when did you first create a talking chimera?" he asked quietly. Mr. Tucker looked puzzled, but replied.

"2 years ago, I believe."

"And when did your wife leave you?"

"…2 years ago."

"One more question. Where did Nina and Alexander go?"

Al gasped as Tucker sighed. "I hate perceptive kids like you."

_"You foolish man." _Chander said in a deadly soft voice. _"You are going to hell." _

Ed socked Tucker in the face and started screaming at him. I crumpled onto the floor and crawled over to Nina- _Nina… _Tears slid down my face as I stroked her nose. She licked my hand.

"Why are you so mad?" Tucker asked Ed in such a freaking calm voice that you'd think we were talking about the weather. "Experimentation is the only way scientists can learn things. Surely even you-"

**"NO FUCKING WAY!" **Ed screamed.

_"Do you truly believe you can rationalize murder?! Because that is what you have done!!" _Chander hissed. Al and I were too stunned to do anything but stare at Nina's twisted form. Yes, I could see the resemblance now.

"**HOW DARE YOU TOY WITH LIVES?!**"

That was when Tucker started laughing. "Yes, toying with lives! Just like you and your little brother!! We are the same, you and I!!"

Ed snapped and punched Tucker so hard I thought his head was going to fall off. "**YOU'RE WRONG!!! YOU'RE WRONG!!! I- I-I-**"

Al grabbed his wrist. "Stop brother, or he'll die."

"Who the hell _CARES?!_" I finally managed to choke out, hugging Nina tightly. Ed lowered his fist, shaking madly. Then he turned and approached us, crouching and hugging Nina as well.

"You can't get anything done if you don't dirty your hands…" Tucker chuckled weakly. Al turned around sharply.

"**Keep talking and this time I'll shut you up.**" Wow. He could be scary. He came to where we where were huddled and took Nina's face in his hand.

"Nina. I'm sorry, but we can't restore you with what we know right now. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Nina just stared at him.

"Pla-ay. Let's play. Let's play."

We all cried.

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* * *

Sasha: How depressing.

Chander: _At least you got a new outfit._

Sasha: True. Review.


	7. Chander's stupid plan

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I hate writing emotional scenes…

Ed: Oh, get over it.

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Hey!!

Al: Sorry, Miss Lunatic. He's a bit depressed….

Sasha: For a damn good reason.

Chander: _Lovely Lady Lunatic owns nothing. Reviews are appreciated._

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_._

_._

"How long do you four plan to sulk like this?" Mustang's voice sounded through the torrential rain.

"Shut up." Ed muttered.

"Do you really have time to take a break for something as minor as this?" Roy continued irritatingly.

_"Fool. Do you have any idea how valuable life is?" _Chander hissed, shivering. I was amazed he was still with us, despite his hatred of water.

"I'm going to find a way to restore all of us. But I'm not a devil or a God." Ed whispered. Then he stood up and howled.

"**WE'RE HUMAN BEINGS!!! AND WE COULN'T EVEN SAVE ONE LITTLE GILR!!!!**"

"We're human…" I whispered. I glanced at Chander, wondering what he was thinking. Then I sneezed.

"You'll catch a cold. Go back and rest." Roy ordered. We reluctantly complied.

.

It was still raining when we headed to Roy's office. I raised my hand to knock, but before I could, the woman with the sharp eyes opened the door.

"Oh, lieutenant Hawkeye…" Ed said. _Hawkeye. Gotta remember that. _I am terrible with names.

"What's wrong? You all are up early…" She looked concerned.

_"We wish to know what will happen to Nina and that beast, Tucker." _Chander mewed from his usual perch on my shoulder. Hawkeye was quiet.

"I'm sorry, but they are dead." She finally said.

"WHAT??" I screamed.

"Officially, the two of them were killed. I'm heading to the scene now."

"We're coming with you!" Ed cried.

"No." She said firmly.

"Why not?!"

"It's better that you don't see." She turned on her heel and left. Chander spoke.

_"That disgusting man got what he deserved. But the girl…"_

"Yeah. Nina had the short straw from the start." I murmured.

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Ed and Al sat below the old clock tower. They were talking in hushed voices about the meaning of life and such. I, on the other hand, sat on top of the clock tower, with Chander by my side.

"…Chander?" I asked. His ears twitched. "Why did we join Ed and Al?" He sighed.

_"Those two seek the philosopher's stone. Can you not think of anyone else who seeks such power?"_

"You mean… the sinless guy?"

_"As long as we stay with these two, I have a feeling that the ones we seek will come to us. But…" _His voice grew softer. _"I wonder if we couldn't have stopped this…"_

I heard shouting and glanced down. And nearly fainted.

An officer's body was lying on the ground, blood pouring out from his insides. The scarred man who had killed him was walking towards Ed, who seemed frozen.

"DAMMIT!!" I screamed, leaping off the tower. "RUN!!!"

Ed snapped out of his trance and shouted, "RUN, AL!!" before taking off.

I swooped down next to them. They were running so fast that I could barely keep up to them, even while flying.

_"What have you done to anger this man so?!" _Chander yowled, claws digging into my red tank top.

"I don't even KNOW him!!!" Ed screeched.

"In here, guys!" Al had drawn a transmutation circle on an alley wall and made a barricade. "Now he can't follow us!"

CRASH!! Scar man blasted a hole through the wall.

"Swe-et. He's an alchemist, too. Now we're all gonna die." I grumbled.

"DEEEEEHHHH!!!!!" Ed and Al screamed in unison, trying to flee. Naturally, Scar man used alchemy to block their path.

….But not mine.

"I'm getting help!!" I yelled. "Chander, stay here. Make sure these two don't die!" He nodded and leapt off my shoulder as I shot upward. Scar man tried to block my path, but I was faster than him.

I flew as high as I could and looked down. There! Patrol cars! I dived down to them.

"Hey!! HEY!!" I saw Mustang, who looked up at me in shock. I guess he didn't know I could fly.

"Sasha?! Where are the Elrics-"

"They're being attacked by a scarred guy!!" He gasped.

"It's Scar!" He cried. I stared at him blankly.

"Scar?" I repeated. "What an uncreative name." I turned. "Follow me!!" I led the way back to the alley that Ed, Al, and Chander were trapped in.

I froze when I took in the scene. Al's armor had been ripped apart, and he lay helpless on the ground. Chander appeared to be unconscious. (Ha. Some demon.) Ed, automail arm missing, was kneeling before Scar. Scar was about to kill him.

Mustang fired a shot in the air to catch their attention. "THAT'S AS FAR AS YOU GO." He shouted. I crossed my legs in the air and waved at Scar. He scowled at me.

"Colonel! Sasha!" Ed cried in relief.

Mustang pointed his pistol at Scar. "This man is behind the murders of several prominent state alchemists. Including… Shou Tucker."

I fell out of the air and landed on my butt. "So you killed Nina?!" I yelped. Wow, small world. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Chander struggle to his feet and limp over to me.

"Alchemists twist the natural form of things. I am a messenger of God. I carry out God's judgment." Chander burst out laughing.

_"Y-YOU?! A messenger of GOD??" _He toppled over in hysterics. _"NO GOD IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER MAKE YOU THEIR MESSENGER!!!" _

"Did you hit him in the head?" I asked Scar, who simply glared at the little kitten.

"Why then, do you only seek to destroy state alchemists?" Mustang asked him.

"Do not interfere or I will kill you too."

"Interesting." Mustang tossed Hawkeye his pistol and started forward.

"Colonel Mustang!" She cried.

"What are you doing, Roy?!" I stood.

"Roy… Mustang?" Scar said slowly. "The Flame alchemist?"

"Indeed." Mustang held up his gloved hand.

"Today is a good day!" Scar chuckled. He turned to me. "Are you a state alchemist as well?"

"Nope. I'm a psychic, not an alchemist. Roy, what are you gonna do?"Rather than answering me, he lunged at Scar. I sensed a problem. "Um, Roy-"

"COL-" Hawkeye threw herself forward and tripped Mustang. The she shot at Scar, who somehow managed to dodge the bullets.

"Hey!!" Mustang yelped. "What do you think you're doing?!"

I crouched next to him. "She just saved your life, dumbass. You can't make a fire in rain." The expression on his face was priceless.

"Alchemists and those who dare to stand in my way!!" Scar cried. "I WILL ANHILLATE YOU ALL!!!!!!"

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Bored of the fighting, I walked over to where Ed and Al were crouched. "You two ok?" I asked, concerned, as a rather buff and pompous man who declared himself as 'Alex Louis Armstrong, the Strong Armed alchemist', (Gawd, I was never gonna be able to remember that name) boastfully went up against Scar. Ed whispered, "I've been worse."

_"I notice that you didn't ask how __**I **__was." _Chander grumbled, completely ignoring the massive fight behind us. I rolled my eyes. Why would I worry about him? Could demons even die? I was then momentarily distracted when Armstrong… ripped his shirt off. Oookay then. I turned back to the Metal Bros. "What about you, Al? You ok?" He nodded, but didn't say anything.

BAM! BAM! I looked over my shoulder again to see that Hawkeye had pulled out a huge-ass sniper and was shooting at Scar. Haha… She was scary. One of the shots grazed his face. His shades fell off, revealing… Red eyes?!

"An Ishvarite!" Mustang snarled. Scar just looked at him.

"…It seems I am at a disadvantage." He sighed. I snorted.

"Ya think?"

"Do you really think you can get away?" Mustang challenged. Scar broke through into the sewers with a massive explosion.

"Apparently he can." I quipped.

_"Sasha." _Chander murmured very softly. _"We must follow him."_

"What?! Are you crazy?? He MUST have hit you in the head!!"

_"Listen to me, Sasha. The ones we seek feed off of human lives, remember?" _I nodded. _"That man was Ishbalian. His entire race was wiped out in a civil war a few years ago. That's a lot of lives."_

I paled. "You mean, those sin guys have something to do with it?!"

_"That is my theory."_

"But he'll kill us!!"

_"We are not state alchemists. He has no reason to kill us." _

"But…" My eyes drifted to the brothers. "What about…"

_"They'll be fine. Now come!! He is getting away as we speak!!" _He jumped onto my shoulder.

I sighed, glancing wistfully at the brothers, who were talking. "I'm sorry. Don't try to follow me." I shouted at them. They looked confused, but then Ed went white as a sheet.

"NO!! DON'T-"

"I'm sorry. I have to." And with that, I flew down the hole after Scar.

'Cause I'm just such a _genius _that way.

.

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Lovely Lady Lunatic: HA!! Bet ya didn't see that one coming!!!

All: …

Sasha: …You trying to get me killed, woman!?!

Chander: _Review, please… while we are still alive…_


	8. Scar and the Power Puff Girls

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Sasha? Chander? Where did they go?

Ed: They're ditching to go get ice cream. Apparently they want to have one last meal before they die.

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I told them I wasn't going to kill them off!! Why does no one believe me?!

Ed: Because it's _you._ Who owns nothing, by the way. Except for Sasha and Chander.

Al: Review…

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Sewers are GROSS. Everything is all slimy and green and there are rats EVERYWHERE.

And it doesn't make it any more fun being in the company of a serial killer and a demon kitty. Chander and I had spent three whole days in the disgustingness, searching for Scar. And, now that we _had _found him, we wasted another day bombarding him with questions, most of which he ignored.

"So, describe to me the destruction of your country." I asked Scar, writing in a little note pad that Chander had transmuted for me.

"We were attacked by your country's soldiers and state alchemists after we rebelled when an officer shot and killed an innocent child." He grunted.

"And how do you feel about that?"

"I believe I made my feelings quite clear when I attacked your short friend."

"I see. Any… odd beings hanging around during that time?" I asked, scribbling away.

"Such as?"

"I dunno, really evil people?"

He stopped short and whipped around. He approached me slowly, with a deadly expression on his face. I found myself pressed up against the nasty sewer wall.

"Why do you ask me these things? Does my pain amuse you?" He growled, red eyes flashing. I cowered.

"No! It's just… I'm looking for some people. I think that they're connected to your country's downfall. So…" My voice became pleading. "Please tell me?"

He frowned, but continued walking. I breathed a sigh of relief a trailed after.

"I know nothing of the inner politics that started the civil war. You are wasting your time."

"Whaa?!" My face fell. I turned on Chander. "_Stupid!!_ We spent five flippin days in here for nothing!!" He wasn't listening. His little nose was twitching, sniffing the air. Then he hissed in surprised as he fell off of my shoulder.

_"IT'S ONE OF __THEM__!!!" _He screeched. Scar and I turned. Standing behind us was a little man who was fatter than he was tall.

"Yow." I whistled. "20 bucks says that this one is Gluttony." Fatty looked at me in surprise.

"How do you know my name?" He asked in a voice that suggested a mental imbalance.

"EEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!" I screamed. "It IS him!!!" I turned to Chander. "Whadda we do? WHADDA WE DO?!?! **YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHAT WE ARE SUPPOSED TO DO IN SITUATIONS LIKE THIS!!!!!**"

_"Shut up!!" _He screamed back.

"You two know this man?" Scar asked tightly, shielding me. _Hey. That's nice of him… For a serial killer, anyway…_

_"Yes. He is one of the Seven Deadly Sins." _Chander mewed, darting in front of us. _"EVIL ONE!!! PREPARE TO BE EXORCISED!!!!!!" _I rolled my eyes.

Gluttony, apparently growing tired of the conversation, lunged at us. Scar destroyed some of the foundation of the sewer, probably hoping to make it collapse on the guy. Well, it worked. Except for one wee little flaw.

It collapsed on _us._

_._

_._

"WOW!" I yelled after I finally came to, knocking aside some rubble and soaring into the air. "What a FABULOUS idea THAT was!!" I looked around. "YO! SCAR? CHANDER? HELLOOO??"

No answer. I groaned. How long had I been unconscious?

I blinked. Was that a meow I heard?! I looked around. Yes!! There was Chander!! I swooped over to him. "Where have you been?!" I cried. He looked awful. Blood matted his fur, and he appeared to be limping.

_"I could ask you the same. Listen," _He spoke hurriedly. _"I followed Gluttony to his hideout. He left soon after, but I think there are others still there. I can't be sure, though. Are you up for a fight?"_

"Uuughh. I REALLY don't want to fight in this condition. But-" I cracked my knuckles. "-I'll do it to get my memory back."

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.

"…Wow. This is really ominous." I mumbled. "My fighting spirit seems to have run far, far away."

_"Don't be a baby. Hell is much scarier than this." _Chander hissed.

The building looked like a haunted house, basically. What wasn't boarded up was covered in barbed wire. The whole thing screamed FORBIDDEN.

So naturally, we were going in.

"…Guess there's no point in postponing this." I grumbled. I grabbed Chander and took off flying, landing silently on the decrepit building's roof.

_"Hey… can you hear something?" _Chander whispered. I listened.

"**Give me a body**…" I froze. The voice was muffled, but it was there. "**Give me a new body! GIVE ME**-" There was a horrible screeching noise. Then a silky voice laughed coolly, "Oh, shut the hell up, you nitwit."

_"It's another sin!!" _Chander gasped. _"I can smell it!!" _I opened my mouth to reply when I heard a familiar voice scream.

"WHAA?? WHY AT A TIME LIKE THIS??!!"

"Th-That's ED!!" I yelped. I turned to Chander. "DO SOMETHING!!!"

Chander set his paws, and with a loud explosion, we burst in through the roof. I snatched at Chander and stopped us in midair.

"S- SASHA?!?" Ed yelped. Wow, he was a _mess. _His fair hair was soaked in blood, his clothes were mangled, and his automail arm hung limply at his side.

"Hey, Edo!" I sang. "Ya don't look so good." He looked kind of pissed. I vaguely wondered why, but I was somewhat distracted by the other two people in the room- a woman with really long black hair wearing a dress that showed way too much cleavage, and a guy (guy?) who looked like a pineapple. (A hot pineapple, but yes, a pineapple. What was he _thinking _when he got that hair cut?!)Both were wearing black and had odd tattoos. Pineapple was holding Ed by the front of his shirt.

...And they were both looking at me as though I were an alien, green skin and all.

"**WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!**" Ed's face was beet red. I stared at him in utter shock as he shoved Pineapple away and approached me. "**WHY THE HELL DID YOU FOLLOW SCAR?!?**"

"We wanted to know why he tried to off you! Duh!" I was indignant. Why was he so mad?

"**YOU COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED, YOU IDIOTS!!!**"

_"Seeing as we are still alive, why don't you just calm down? We learned some interesting things from Scar, after all-" _

"Did that fur ball just talk?" Pineapple was staring in amazement at Chander, who bristled.

"Are you guys homunculi?" I asked out of the blue. Oops. Now they were all staring at me, including Ed, who looked dumbfounded. "Lemme take a wild guess." I pointed at Cleavage. "Lust?"

"How- how did you know?" She gasped. I gestured at her cleavage in reply and she flushed slightly. I turned to Pineapple.

"Hmm. You look rather full of yourself… Pride, maybe?" He glowered.

"It's _Envy._ Now tell us how you know who we are." He hissed. I giggled.

"You know, it shouldn't bug you all so much that I know your names. If you really want, I can call Lust 'Blossom', you 'Buttercup', and Gluttony 'Bubbles'…" He didn't seem to like that. Lust, on the other hand, stared at me thoughtfully.

"You are Sasha Arnette, aren't you?" I nearly toppled out of the air. How did she know my name?!? Oh…haha… karma…

"But…" She turned to Chander. "Who are you, little one? Wasn't it you who broke the roof?" Chander glared.

_"I am the sole survivor of a chimera experiment gone horribly wrong." _He replied robotically. _"When I was human I was an alchemist, so it makes sense that I am still capable of my former abilities, even in this weak form. Why do you ask me this?"_ It was Buttercup/Pineapple who answered.

"The girl is floating without any transmutation circle. You broke the roof- again with no transmutation circle. You two are some of the _precious sacrifices _we've been looking for!!" He delivered a swift kick to Ed's chest, making him collapse. Then he charged at us.

"Dude. I hate to break it to ya, Buttercup, but I'm NOT A MOTHER FUCKING ALCHEMIST!!!!!! I AM A PSYCHIC!!! THERE- IS- A- DIFFERENCE!!!!" I zipped out of his way, screaming all the while, but I don't think he was listening. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Chander and Blossom scuffling, Chander nipping at her dress, Blossom lashing out as though she were trying to catch him. Finally, she kicked him so hard he went skidding across the room where he lay unmoving. I only realized that I had dropped my guard while trying to see if my Fluffy was ok when I felt two things pierce through my shoulder and my thigh.

"Ow." I turned to see Blossom, looking smug. Apparently she can extend her nails and use them to stab people. Fabulous. "Blossom, you are _such _a bitch."

Then I fainted, like the super awesome, epic heroine I am.

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.

Ed: Wow, you two lost twice in one chapter…

Sasha: SHUT UUUPPP!!! I WILL GET YOU NEXT TIME, YOU FREAKING POWER PUFF GIRLS!!!

Chander: _I'm having a difficult time keeping up with all of Sasha's ridiculous nicknames._

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Really? Maybe I'll make a list of them all…

Al: Review… even though I'm not in this chapter… sniff…

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I LOVE YOU AL!!!!!! DON'T CRY!!!!!!! YOU WILL ALWAYS BE THE CUTEST, NO MATTER HOW FLUFFY CHANDER IS!!!!!!

Al: Eeeek!!!! Get off meeee!!!!!!

Chander: _You heard the mortal. Review please._


	9. Hughes

Lovely Lady Lunatic: So, I'm working on the list of all of Sasha's nicknames for everyone just so nobody gets confused. Here goes:

**Chander: Fluffy**

**Ed and Al: Metal Bros.**

**Lieutenant Havoc: Cigarette Man**

**Roy Mustang: Dumbass**

**Scar: SCAR! (Imagine that.)**

**Lust: Blossom**

**Envy: Buttercup**

**Gluttony: Bubbles**

**Lust, Envy, & Gluttony: Power Puff Girls**

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I think that's all of them. Let me know if I forgot any, or if you come up with a really cool one!

Lust: Wow. Her memory is so bad she has to resort to nicknames?

Gluttony: Can I eat her?

Lovely Lady Lunatic: You can eat this.

_Hands Gluttony a bomb. He eagerly eats it and explodes._

Lovely Lady Lunatic: BAHAHAA!! THAT'LL TEACH YOU FROM TRYING TO EAT MY CHARACTERS!!

Envy: R&R, people. The Lunatic owns nothing.

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My shoulder was hurt.

My thigh was hurt.

My ribs were hurt.

I was dehydrated.

I felt feverish.

The light was too bright.

The bed was too hard.

And my dear, sweet, concerned visitors were TOO DAMN LOUD.

"Will you guys please shut up?" I managed to ask. My voice was disturbingly weak.

"Sasha? SASHA!!!" I flinched. "YOU'RE UP!!!!" I think the voice was Al's. Just to be sure, I cracked my eyes open a hair. Yep. It was Al. He, Ed, and a blonde with a wrench were all crowded around me. Chander was curled up in a patch of sunlight on my pillow and appeared to be sleeping. I was surprised to see that both he and Ed were unbandaged and looked perfectly fine. Ed was even walking around.

"Why are YOU all better so fast?" I grumbled, jealous. Chander snorted.

_"It might have something to do with the fact that you were crushed by a collapsing sewer when Edward was not. As for me, people like myself heal much more quickly than humans do."_ I glared at him.

"I thought you were asleep."

_"Nice to see you, too."_ He yawned widely.

"Sasha…" Al started, but I held up my hand, which looked a bit thin.

"I know, I know. It was a stupid plan, and I'm sorry." I paused. "Anyways, it was Fluffy's idea." Chander hissed at that.

"But Sasha… do you have any idea of how worried we were about you?? Y- you could've…"

_"Scar's quarrel is with you, not us." _Chander sighed. _"I wouldn't have suggested following him if I'd known that Gluttony was planning on attacking Scar."_

Ed frowned, but he let it go. Then he glanced down, looking abashed, and asked, "So, Sasha, would you be ok if we left you here for a little while to go visit our teacher in Dublith? Not to mention Winry wants to go to Rush Valley…" He gestured at the blonde, who smiled friendlily.

"Of course you can go!" I said, surprised. "Why in Hell would you have to ask my permission to take a vacation when I spontaneously decided to chase after a serial killer?" Al and Winry laughed at that.

"Well, we didn't want to make it seem like we were abandoning you… It's going to be a really long time before you can travel again…" Ed mumbled. I giggled.

"It's FINE. Go ahead; take a vacation with your bro and your girl friend. I will rest and gather up my strength so that next time I'LL be the one to kick some Power Puff Girl butt."

"Thank- WINRY ISN'T MY GIRLFRIEND!! SHE'S MY MECHANIC!!"

"Sure, sure."

.

.

I really hate it when doctors say you aren't allowed to get out of _bed_. I will get out of my bed if I feel like it, thank you very much. Besides, I wasn't even walking, not technically.

I drifted lazily through the empty streets, wondering what Ed, Al, and (…gah. I already forgot her name… I shall call her Gearhead.) Gearhead were doing. It was really quiet and peaceful, with just a slight breeze ruffling my hair, which was a bit limp due to my current inability to wash it. (Damn cast…) I realized I must look like a ghost; blood red hair, covered in bandages, in a white, billowing hospital gown as I floated along… The thought made me snicker, and I wondered idly if my time would be best spent terrorizing teenagers. No, Chander would kill me. I sighed. Party pooping puff ball.

"…You wouldn't stab your wife, now would you?"

I stopped dead, feeling the blood drain from my face. Then I zoomed around the corner as I heard a gun cock. I saw a man in glasses that I recognized from the whole Scar fiasco, and a woman with short, dirty blonde hair, holding a gun to his head and wearing a smirk.

I knew that smirk.

Just as the gun fired, I was able to turn the bullet a bit, but it wasn't enough. It hit the man's shoulder, and he screamed in pain, but at least he wasn't dead.

"**WHAT THE FUCK, BUTTERCUP!!!!**" I screamed at the top of my lungs. The woman started and turned, smirk quickly being replaced by a look of wide eyed shock.

"You, brat?! Shouldn't you be in the hospital?!?" He/she screeched, reverting back to his stupid pineapple self. I smiled sweetly.

"Unfortunately for you, I never obey the rules unless I want to." I then proceeded to snatch the gun out of his hand and beat him around the head and neck area with it. He yowled and flailed his arms.

"Bitch!!! Knock it off!!!" He lunged at me, and I dodged, floating out of his reach and giggling merrily.

Our fight was interrupted by the squeal of tiers on pavement. Buttercup swore, turned into a dog, and scampered away. I heard Glasses groan in agony, and I dropped to his side to check on him. His face was deathly pale, and his jaw was clenched in an effort not to scream. I noticed that he was clutching a picture in an iron grip- when I saw it I resisted the urge to barf. It was a picture of what I assumed to be his wife and kid. His wife was the one who Buttercup had imitated as he was about to shoot the poor guy. _Damn it, Buttercup… that's low, even for a pineapple… _

"Hughes?! _HUGHES!!!_" I heard a familiar voice roar. Mustang was staring at Glasses- er, Hughes- with a look of utter horror.

"Roy…" The man coughed, spattering me and Roy in blood. "The military… is in danger…"

Roy knelt by Hughes. "In danger of what, Hughes?"

"H- homun…cu…li…" His eyes closed.

Well, _shit._

.

.

Roy and I sat together on the bench in the hall outside of Hughes's hospital room. Roy looked severely ill, and there were dark purple shadows beneath his eyes. I held his hand. Not in a romantic way- nothing like that. But it was obvious that he needed something comforting, and he gripped my hand very tightly.

"You should be resting." He finally said quietly. "This isn't good for your recovery…"

"I'm the last person you need to worry about right now." I told him firmly.

_"Yes, no need to worry about Sasha. After all, she only SNUCK AWAY, ON HER OWN, in the MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, HALF DEAD, to fight a BLOODTHIRSTY HOMUNCULOUS."_ Chander snarled.

"Can it, Fluffy. Thanks to me, Hughes is alive, and Buttercup has some nice new bruises." I said, shrugging.

Chander glared at me, his blood-red eyes flashing. Just as he opened his mouth to scold me some more, the doctor walked out. Roy jerked to his feet, looking terrified.

"He's alive." The doctor said tiredly. "However, he lost so much blood that he slipped into a coma… I'm sorry."

Roy put a shaking hand over his eyes and took a deep breath. "As… as long as he's alive."

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Yes. I did it. I SAVED HUGHES. BE MAD IF YOU WANT, I DON'T CARE!!!!!

Sasha: Yes you do. You'd probably have a panic attack if someone dissed your precious work.

Ed: What's the point of saving him if you're just going to put him in a coma?!

Lovely Lady Lunatic: SHUT UP!!!!!!!!

Chander:_ I like this chapter. I get to yell at Sasha._

Al: Review!


	10. The Author's choice

Sasha: AARRGH! I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! WHERE IS SHE?

Chander:_ Who are you speaking of?_

Sasha: The Lunatic! It's been WEEKS! I'm bored out of my MIND!

Mustang: Do you think we should be worried?

Chander: _Why? I myself am quite enjoying this vacation-_

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Sucks for you, Fluffy.

Sasha: Where have you been?

Master Mushroom King: With me.

Chander: _WHAT?_

Lovely Lady Lunatic: I decided that this story didn't have enough flow, so I decided to write a new and improved version. Master Mushroom King helped.

Master Mushroom King: Not really… I just gave advice as to what might make the story more interesting. I'm a reader, not a writer.

Lovely Lady Lunatic: To those of you who like the story the way it is, I'm really sorry, but I was getting bored of writing it, and when the_ author _is bored, _everyone _is.

Chander: _Will you be changing anything significant?_

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Yep. We are turning Sasha from an annoying bitch into an annoying, _immature_, slightly cuter bitch. The plot is the same, though.

Sasha: WHAT?

Lovely Lady Lunatic: Just give it a shot, guys. It's called The Messenger of Truth. READ IT ALL THE WAY THROUGH BEFORE YOU TRY TO KILL ME. Thanks!


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